friday morning, parents make voyage across state line and travel time leaping an hour in their future - my present. honors. outstanding french student of the year, foreign language and literature honer society, psychology honor society. somehow stealthily slipped beneath radar. me. me whose laziness leaps or rather lies to new levels. some awards were ties. we wondered were they racing. mother father sister proud, i feeling like i've fooled the world.

friday night spent anticipating a saturday morning inflitration into surrounding neighborhood. revitalization. seven fifteen and earpiercing lance of red flashing noise sent as reveille. me cursing ghettos and projects, thinking they're stealing my morning of slumber. theives. group of complaining redsleepeyed students assembled ironically in conjunction with the willing workers association. we make silent trek several blocks and across symbolic train racks - now on the wrong side. we arrive to the silent jeers and eyeful undressings of state prisoners. we were not meant to feel welcome.

collection of arms against overgrown absentee landlords' vacant lots turned crack dens. myself with a sling blade reminding me of summers past spent swinging said slingblade against the silent protest of sapling trees. i am lazy. my one hundred and forty five pounds suprise more than myself with the fervor of felled trees and almost two hours without water or break. i sliced swung strained to the tune of a bleeding palm. manual labor freeing my soul. four hours. one sloping vacant lot. one hand with less skin than before. arms felt less like saplings and more like giants. i felt mighty.